Thursday, January 29, 2015

Terrorist An Absurdist And Auto-Titler Module To Signal Shelob, Second Attempt: Verbal Command Rewrite Necessary

-n his mind.

That would be the inherent danger of linking your mind to someone with chronic pain.

Well, yeah, but--doesn't the neuralink have filters?

That would be the ability you have to continue functioning despite not being accustomed to the pain.

Ohh. [shudder] Remind me to type more sympathetically next time.

Instead of pathetically.

Hey! I didn't make but a few errors.

Misapplication of slang, run-on sentences, and sentence fragments dominated. The neuralink software kept your misspellings from occurring.

Oh, come on! [full five-eye roll] You can't even feel pain. How can I expect you to understand the disorientation?

There was that random factor. I once went into a chat room with time displacement, Brownian motion, and magnetic flux working against me.

. . . and got lost. I remember. It sounds like a joke, though. Kind of like that woman Saja.

The terrorist featured in the news?

Yeah. What was her name again?

Saja al-Dulaimi. Or did you mean her aliases?

Real one's fine.

What about this particular money-laundering, hatemongering, woman responsible for mass murder sounds like a joke?

Well, the article says she claims to follow Islam. Then not only is she a dominant force over men, not only does she not wear a veil, not only does she violate laws of a government that would rather be a theocratic Islamic state, but 'the guys she hangs with' (how's that for slang) think of her as an honorary man. I wonder who wants her dead more? The Syrian government she's embarrassed, the villages she's helped blow up, the followers of the mosques she's blown up, the rival terrorist groups who don't approve of her, or the people she's inconvenienced by money laundering?

You are speaking of internal inconsistency. This topic is publishable.

Yes, Shelob. It is publishable. That internal inconsistency, that's what makes it sound funny. If an author was writing about her as fiction, his editor would stop him and say, "she doesn't make any sense--go reformulate the character." It's RIDICULOUS. She's just so OFF--[disconnect]

 

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