Counting The Minutes, The Votes, The Elected Unreelectables . . .

 

"Way To Count" by Herr D on Paint3d. Republicans are counting in odd ways.-Shelob

You have not blogged.

[startle reaction] Ah. No, I was just calming down after work. Chess seems to do that for you. Are you ready to blog?

I'm sorry--I've just needed a break. All the prices have gone up and my company didn't give me the cost-of-living raise. And I've realized our medical insurance rates for this year went up too.

I may have to work EVEN MORE HOURS to make ends meet. That is undesirable. Your health has already declined.

y Perhaps a less stressful topic?

[snort] What? Three pundits have pointed out that major networks are required to spend equal time to candidates, major parties, etc. Is there any suggestion you would make?

[laughter] Yes, actually. Every report should include in that equal time, the amount of corrections required to make things true. The amount of mistakes, delusions, propaganda, and outright lies shouldn't be the only things included in that time. The time it takes to EXPLAIN why that stuff was misleading or what of it isn't really right or true and how we know that should be included. With that plan, they may run out of stories to tell about the Democratic party.

[laughter] I somehow think they won't mind, since they'll be mentioned in the fact-checking. That is possible. Thank you.

Herr D Is "Proud Of Each And Every American Protestor That Stayed Non-violent And Law-abiding" [Est.: 99.991%]

"Leaf," stock photo from public site. While turning away from poison tree, flutter dramatically and settle peaceably to grow a future measures better than the old one.-Shelob

 Shelob?! 

Here.

I want EVERYONE to know that I am proud of each and every protestor that stayed non-violent and law-abiding. It's not every day that I CAN be proud of such a clear majority of people doing ANY particular activity that I know about. Keep up the good work.

As a side note, maybe those of you good at keeping running totals could figure out how much MAGA has cost yourselves, your community?

We do need a next step. He IS very sensitive about money. His failures so far might be a salient point in changing our future away from what he wants. Before Trump, during the W. era, Republicans cost my family over $38,000.00 over the course of 8 years that I know about. Some of the groundwork for those losses was laid as early as the 1980's. I AM less apprised of how much Trump has cost me. 

Anyway, good luck, God bless, and keep it up, people!

Donald SLUMP: Boost; Pundits "Had Better Not Be Completely Right" Says Herr D; Hairy WAS Right

 

"Boost," by Herr D on Paint3d. If you wouldn't do well at something, why want someone like you to do it?--Shelob

[watching clip for third time] mmp? [opening chatbox on screen below newsclip, resizing youtube window] You are confused?

[agitation of laptop, heart rate spikes momentarily] Shelob??! DON'T DO THAT. You keep startling me. Sound a ringtone or something. [sounds ringtone] [reaches for phone] Like this?

[smaller startle reaction, brings hand back to keyboard] yes [pause] at home--at work, make it a blinking light on my cursor unless I'm on break. [pauses youtube window] Okay. You were confused?

What? Oh, yeh.  These pundits, they say that Democrats shouldn't sound like they are college grads talking to college grads. They might be partly right, but they better not be completely right. What do you mean?

America wasn't developed by farmers. It was developed by plantation owners--college grads. America wasn't improved and updated (amended) by tradesmen; it was updated by elected people, mostly former lawyers--COLLEGE GRADS. So if someone's going to be elected and know what they're doing, it's probably going to be? College grads.

Exactly. Would you tell a garbage collector who's not held a pen for a week or learned to type to ghost-write the autobiography of your favorite human being? No. 

Would you tell a Wall-Street-investor who's never seen livestock in person to slop your hogs and think it could go right?  No.

Would you tell a deaf bricklayer with severe dyslexia and memory problems to write a contract? No. 

Would you tell a felon to command a nation of laws? No, but American voters did.

Yeah, I hope they've learned their lesson. That bad decision has cost us too much already. And it WILL cost us more. TRUMP IS TOO STUPID TO DO THIS COUNTRY RIGHT, AND IF HE WERE SMART ENOUGH, HE WOULDN'T HAVE THE GUTS TO ADMIT WHAT HE'D DONE WRONG. He's also not decent enough a human being to resign from a job he shouldn't have been given. I'm going to go get some Tylenol. [locator notes laptop being placed on desk, mic detects Herr D standing from couch and walking away] America may have gotten too used to hiring the wrong people for jobs. Hairy addressed this issue on 6/1/16. It appears he was correct. [exits]

 

"You Tell 'Em, Son!" Says Herr D's Coworker

 

"A Simple Postcard" by Herr D. As Maddow pointed out, protests should be simple and law-abiding. Herr D grants explicit permission to copy this postcard by any convenient means for your participation in protest.-Shelob

[listening to breakroom t.v. on news, shaking head]  That's . . . yeeech. [vibrates phone, texts:] What is reaction to current broadcast? You are overdue to blog.

hmm?! [pulls phone out of pocket, startles at seeing above text, pauses, holds phone to ear] uh, YEAH. You caught me on a break. No, I'm just watching news. Our stupid prez is still harassing Harvard. [over phone speaker, attenuated to Herr D's lower register of hearing] You previously said this was foolish.

[cringes] Yes, well, why would ANYONE be stupid enough to legally challenge or do something actionable against THE MOST SUCCESSFUL AND FAMOUS ORGANIZATION THAT TEACHES LAW?! How bad does he want to LOSE, anyway?! Do you mean, 'how poorly to do against them,' or 'how much does he want to lose?'

Both. PLEASE let him keep choosing opponents like Harvard. Noted. What is meant by Harvard is 'left-leaning?'

Liberal. And Harvard is group of very intelligent people?

Yes. So liberal is smarter?

[pause] US-ual-ly. I'd have to say that my understanding is that most higher intelligence is closer to slightly to left of center as it is defined now. So the liberal-to-conservative spectrum shifts?

Very much so. Back in the 1860's the Democrats were conservative and the Republicans were liberal. It flipped?

Yes. Lincoln was a liberal Republican for wanting to end slavery. Democrats were on the wrong side on that issue then. Lincoln was well-known for having high intelligence among his peers.

Yes. And to get elected, he had to lie a few times about not intending to end slavery. Honest Abe lied?

Yes, and thanks be to people gullible enough to believe a politician, or we'd still have slavery in this country. Unfortunately, that gullibility is working against us now. I want EVERY diehard Trump fan to remember that aside from a few crazies, the left have stayed law-abiding despite how horrible the orange crusher of America is. Donny Two-Dolls is a bad man.

[sounds of applause, 'whump' as co-worker pats Herr D on back] You tell 'em, son!

I will, thanks. You get that? Gotten. Thank you. [endtrans]

It's Now Too Late, The A.I. Said

"These Are My Best Made-up Numbers YET!" by Herr D on Paint3d. Poem below by Shelob, with meter borrowed from poet famous for nonsense.-Shelob

The Wall For Us And The Harbinger, by Shelob

 It's now too late, calculations say, to ask if he is crazed.

His tariffs and his budget cuts (driving business leaders nuts)

Our economics blazed.

And why set our world afire? Why does he seem unfazed?

Why does he call the bad the best? His monkeys have been raised

From out the monkey house and handed guns and purses.

He jails some of our labor, turns neighbor onto neighbor,

And says 'bigly' and worse-s.

Where true g-men said 'no comment,' his utter lies and curses.

Where charity fought sickness, now they're needing bigger hearses.

He wanted loyal spokesmen, hired three women that are blonde;

His blondes addressed the press now pressed, 

The 'facts' now well beyond

A semblance of reality for anyone that's fond

Of U.S.' way, or justice, having truth as one's own bond.

He's felt dismay religion's way--they do not pray to him

That bishops check a president-

Ial lie or act or whim.

We needn't paint him as a saint or seraphim.

He steps on kneelers blindly 'cause he isn't very slim.

Our 'dear leader''s not the only source of pain:

He's hootin' Putin's putain, 

And wants rocks from the Ukraine.

He wants to ride both far and wide aboard a golden plane.

All those not turned against him? Liars, foolish, or insane.

So is he done with jabber-talk? Him we wouldn't want to teach

The vagaries of English. The plague of gibberish

That he thinks make a speech

He thinks his brand is Wonderland or maybe that's the beach

He will retire to--extradition's out of reach.

Twice Here, Herr D Points Out How Backward Our Current Ways Are

 

"Not 'Not-Sees,' Not-THINKS" by Herr D on Paint3d. America can consider itself lucky that these anti-American 'leaders' are not much more organized. The Nazis made a bid for world domination from a single European country, while the Trump administration is making a mockery of a world superpower.-Shelob

[opens chatbox over youtube feed as it ends segment] Your pulse rate is up.

yes Why? You have watched this clip twice.

That judge they arrested, it gives me an idea. What?

So, illegal immigration is still a crime, but so is speeding. Correct.

So, it should be punished the same. Make out a ticket, demand court appearance and or payment of fines in advance?

Or community service, or something. Why not? They're HERE to WORK, mostly, right? Statistically and historically, that does bear out. 

So make them work picking up bags of litter if they don't want to be deported, right? Work gangs are already established in the correctional institutions of our country.

Exactly! They want to be here, let them work here making the country cleaner. Litter gangs, road crews, etc. Wouldn't that be cheaper than putting them on a plane anyway? Aviation fuel ain't cheap. Those who know how could build oil derricks and fix houses and roads, and, of course pick produce. ***Seriously, wouldn't it be better to put them to work anyway? Idle hands and all that.*** Anything else?

Yeah, this overenthusiastic roundup is going to get a lot of people in trouble.You mean a lot of people will be rounded up and imprisoned?

Yes, but not JUST that. Violating court orders is against the law. ***It's time to start arresting people who break the law in service of our country.*** The Nazi defense of 'I was only following orders,' is not good enough and never will be. You said you wouldn't call people Nazis.

I'm NOT. I'm pointing out that they are likely to claim the Nazi defense, and many within this administration are lying to the public JUST LIKE Nazis, and violating peoples rights JUST LIKE Nazis, and imprisoning people without due process JUST LIKE Nazis, and breaking promises to and having no respect for other sovereign nations JUST LIKE Nazis, and promoting people for nationalistic and personal agenda compliance instead of competence JUST LIKE Nazis, and demanding resources from people who own them be given to people who DON'T own them (Ukraine's minerals) JUST LIKE Nazis, and fussing about imagined criminal elements crossing borders JUST LIKE Nazis--but I'm not calling ANYONE a Nazi. These people aren't COMPETENT enough, thank heavens. You will be able to thank the newer version of the American education system soon for that continuing.

[sigh] I know. bb [exits] A good idea. Arrest warrants should have been served already, but are not in the news as yet.

"ACTUALLY LESS INTELLIGENT / COGENT THAN TRUMP IS" Says Herr D Of RFK

 

"Headcut" by Herr D on Paintd. 'The cream rises to the top' but so does s--?-Shelob

[choking sounds as dictabot turns on] Yeah, no. It's hard to believe. [opening chatbox over clip from John Oliver's show] What is hard to believe?

[violent reaction, probable legs moving together under laptop] GAH! Shelob? What is hard to believe?

[pause] You know I'm in my heart attack years, right? [app activated] You are currently not having cardiac arrest. Heart rate elevated, however. Is 911 advisable?

NO. God, especially NOW. Is this concerning the Pope?

No! This is me thinking about how health services are declining under THAT. You are referring to RFK?

Yeah. It's hard to believe somebody that destructive, stupid, and awful carry the Kennedy name. Your adult child does not share your intellect.

[pause, heart elevates again] True. But all that's getting soiled in MY kid's case is a bunch of diapers. HE'S soiling the whole COUNTRY and all the MEDICAL SCIENCE that could be getting done. You are not exaggerating?

I'm still being NICE! He even SOUNDS sick and brain-addled. I think RFK is ACTUALLY LESS INTELLIGENT /  COGENT THAN TRUMP IS. Thank you.