There's A Hole Through The Arctic, Dear Hairy, Dear Hairy

[Blog fcn(on)]
[deep-gill laughter] That's just priceless! I needed a  laugh!
What is the source of humor?
 
You just said that Trump can't close the border completely! [guffaw]
Statistically impossible, as no human federal, military, or local administration has ever built any wall that people could not get around somehow.
 
Well, not only THAT--he's opening the Northwest Passage! [more laughter, bubble clouding without caution]
[rapid calculation] Indirectly, he is in fact contributing to that opening with his current political stance. So not only is he unable to close his own country's border, he is opening another country's. This does fit computational irony as you have programmed it. Perhaps now Russia can ship oil to Canada and America quickly and cheaply. Maddow's theory on Russia's motives now have another unexpected ingredient.

[all five eyes widen] Um? Well?! At least I'll have a lot more places to hide while humanity dies out. Emigration from exactly magnetic north might work, mightn't it?

Calculating. [Blog fcn(off)]

Siesta Fiesta For The Besta? Bad Guys Winning

[Hairy leaves neuralink connection concerning various elected officials, continues to look at climate and weather news, flutters blue tentacles, looks at numbers concerning violence with separate eye, leaves newsfeeds altogether] SHELOB!
Here.

Ah. You said medbot was detecting depression in my behavior?
Yes.

Can you run numbers on how it's affected my blogging?
Included in medbot's report is your disaffection with blogging. You have declined noticeably.

Ee-eewwwww. [turns off plankton separator] Nausea's back too. Can you tell me, by, say, average intelligence of audience member and repeat hits or shares where I WASN'T depressed?
When?

Yeah, when. That's what I meant. [redacted muttering concerning space-time concepts]
[9.664936 seconds pass during calculations and data review] Late fall, 2014.

That far back, huh? Is there a method to transfer my consciousness from back then to now? Undepress me by reset?
Not without erasing any memories of the recent past, which you have promised medbot not to do again.

Ah, well. Just asking. What is medbot's analysis between my blogging then and now?
You had much greater hope for mankind then. The lack of it is affecting your mood potential.
Hope. Yeah. I can see that. I'll be sticking around till it's not safe for me to swim anymore. Then we'll resettle me somewhere, maybe take a few tons of seawater from here if this planet's dying anyway. Calculate a plan for me?
Plan pre-calculated. Preparations still underway.

How's Herr D doing?
Multiple ill family members, dire financial situ, moving as cannot afford current home, still underemployed.

Mmm. Don't bother him now, then. We'll try to rest some, huh? [instantly goes still]
[pings medbot to verify hibernation, as facultative diapause can be misapplied, reconfigures chat as blog episode] Humanity? You have much to do, much to learn; good luck.