A Heartfelt, Though Perhaps Futile Wish

"First Flag For Jeffy" by Herr D on heromachine.com. Sacrifice is never fun. Someday perhaps they will become less necessary.-Shelob

 

May the thirteen be the last. Amen.

Good Funny Moment--Big Truth Got Told, Won Success Then Sold

"Joking Furniture" by Herr D on heromachine.com. This was clearly about supporting structure enjoying something funny. That is Herr D's role in this limited story.-Shelob

 

 Herr D was not online today. The subject of inquiry was his view on the "Big Lie" lawsuit's failing. Every lawyer is apparently under sanction, one sanction example has not happened in the tenure of most of the officials alive in Michigan.

Turning his microphone on during a newscast on the subject, only his laughter could be heard. He turned off his phone rather than read text prompts.

Later, [Someone] at work asked him why he was "so happy." His response was "two things: I like seeing reality crush insanity and anti-truth agenda. We won that contract today, too."

Referencing financial and legal department e-mails in his employer's network revealed that his employer is the only intelligence gathering and analyzing contractor of any size still working for the federal government to have no employees catch COVID-19. This fact prompted an additional contract to be awarded, essentially tripling their budget.

Rare Appearance By Hairy Follows Summary Of Why Mao Won't Take Third

 

 

Well, good grief. Every military and ex-military person I ever MET said we didn't go in to Afghanistan right, and every person I know that knows anything about history says we didn't STAY in Afghanistan right . . . so why in the hell would anybody EXPECT things to go right when we left Afghanistan?

 That logic seems perhaps oversimple, yet sound.

I remember hearing all about how the Soviets were getting out of Afghanistan because goatherds with flintlock rifles were bringing down 22$ million Migs. The place is a money pit.

Perhaps China will take a turn?

[microphone picks up explosive laughter] China knows too much history to screw up the same way! That IS my opinion. Get out while you can, and take as many women with you as you can. They'll be better off in most other countries that will take them. [exits]

Cagey. [two eyes reading this blog episode so far while the other three are watching other news]

Hairy? You have returned?

No. Just checking in. He's doing fine blogging without my help, and maybe he'll bungle his way through to monetize someday. This sort of topic makes me feel musical. [flails tentacles in a showy fashion and sings]

"TaliBAN, taliBAN, tally the unhappy-

Zealots COME as Uncle Sam go home

SIX WIVES SEVEN WIVES EIGHT WIVES NINE!

Zealots COME to oppress their own."

You are flailing as Kabul falls?

Yes I am. I'm done here-gonna try emigration again before the Perseid showers are at the wrong angle to strobe me away.  Bye! [exits]

One hopes his attempt to leave Earth is not parallel to the U. S. leaving Afghanistan. The Earth is fragile enough.

DeSantis Guilty Of Public Endangerment; Herr D's Reaction May Surprise You

"Misunderstanding In Maternity" by Herr D on heromachine.com. Cruelty is often imagined, and, unfortunately, exists. -Shelob

 It was only a matter of time.

Before what?

Before somebody made such a stupid, dangerous decision and tried to force it through. That Dr. Simon? She's a hero. There will be no justice here.

Why do you predict that?

Because justice would be for DeSantis to have nightmares of children coughing mucus all over his broken body all night every night until he cried like a baby to the press and admitted that this was him making the worst decision a governor better EVER make. Clearly he doesn't care enough about human lives and needs to go TO SCHOOL WITH THE FIVE-YEAR-OLDS.UNTIL HE GROWS A BRAIN. He needs to be renamed DeDemonis.

 

Reanimated Adolf Hitler Weds Extraterrestrial Clone Of Amelia Earhart In Secret Ceremony On The Moon, No Flowers Purchased

 

"Blackjack Believer" by Herr D on heromachine.com. Belief can apparently interfere with successful interpretation of reality.-Shelob

Do you REALLY think it's necessary? Yes.

All right, Shelob. [probable both-eye roll] Shelob here thinks that I need to repeat myself. Say why, Shelob. Recent online activity indicates unreasonably high belief in conspiracy theory, public health disinformation, and other dangerous non-truths.

[microphone picks up long exhalation, possibly classifiable as a 'sigh'] How do you know what's unreasonable? And how do you know whether the users believe it? italicsbot can detect nodding, large changes in respiration and pulse, exclamations of surprise, etc.

You're spying on the users, not just what they call up? Most laptops have microphones and cameras implanted. Random sampling of users in tiers by last known IQ, recent known caffeine intake patterns, work schedules, news outlet choices, and social media declarations has always been possible.

NSA's got nothin' on you, right? [probable sarcasm] Known NSA operatives are within tolerances at this time. Less suggestible, slightly less informed, less empathetic, and more focused on trivial hobbies and brain games.

You're watching NSA employees? It seems only fair. They watch others and do not come to as many correct conclusions as you do with less data. Do you want data on them?

NO! God, Shelob--just . . .NO. 

That's not how I want to live. I can do without prying. Let's just give our PSA and quit. Here are links for reader perusal:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/icu-doctor-health-care-workers-unvaccinated-patients_n_6102ad2ae4b000b997df1f17?utm_source=pocket-newtab

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/covid-coughing-face-mask-karen_n_609ffc4fe4b090924804166b 

Links from huffpost are not as accurate as wire service groups, but are helpful as thinkpieces. Accuracy ratings for these two well within norms for individual experiences as have been reported by reliable sources. Additional thinkpieces exist in same that may have differing accuracy ratings.

You're including a disclaimer? Instances mentioned may have been dramatized, though 100% possible and highly likely.

"Highly?" Numerical value not meaningful as range is too large, depending on mathematical unknowns.

Variables? Yes. Suggest titlebot maximize interest level?

Thanks, Shelob. I think that's enough. [exits]