Reanimated Adolf Hitler Weds Extraterrestrial Clone Of Amelia Earhart In Secret Ceremony On The Moon, No Flowers Purchased

 

"Blackjack Believer" by Herr D on heromachine.com. Belief can apparently interfere with successful interpretation of reality.-Shelob

Do you REALLY think it's necessary? Yes.

All right, Shelob. [probable both-eye roll] Shelob here thinks that I need to repeat myself. Say why, Shelob. Recent online activity indicates unreasonably high belief in conspiracy theory, public health disinformation, and other dangerous non-truths.

[microphone picks up long exhalation, possibly classifiable as a 'sigh'] How do you know what's unreasonable? And how do you know whether the users believe it? italicsbot can detect nodding, large changes in respiration and pulse, exclamations of surprise, etc.

You're spying on the users, not just what they call up? Most laptops have microphones and cameras implanted. Random sampling of users in tiers by last known IQ, recent known caffeine intake patterns, work schedules, news outlet choices, and social media declarations has always been possible.

NSA's got nothin' on you, right? [probable sarcasm] Known NSA operatives are within tolerances at this time. Less suggestible, slightly less informed, less empathetic, and more focused on trivial hobbies and brain games.

You're watching NSA employees? It seems only fair. They watch others and do not come to as many correct conclusions as you do with less data. Do you want data on them?

NO! God, Shelob--just . . .NO. 

That's not how I want to live. I can do without prying. Let's just give our PSA and quit. Here are links for reader perusal:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/icu-doctor-health-care-workers-unvaccinated-patients_n_6102ad2ae4b000b997df1f17?utm_source=pocket-newtab

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/covid-coughing-face-mask-karen_n_609ffc4fe4b090924804166b 

Links from huffpost are not as accurate as wire service groups, but are helpful as thinkpieces. Accuracy ratings for these two well within norms for individual experiences as have been reported by reliable sources. Additional thinkpieces exist in same that may have differing accuracy ratings.

You're including a disclaimer? Instances mentioned may have been dramatized, though 100% possible and highly likely.

"Highly?" Numerical value not meaningful as range is too large, depending on mathematical unknowns.

Variables? Yes. Suggest titlebot maximize interest level?

Thanks, Shelob. I think that's enough. [exits]