Monday, July 14, 2014

Scandalous CEO Sweatshop To Be Founded In Small Country Of Your Choice

[alarm sounding softly, rapid soft sucker sounds approach, various machine noises]


Apparently, that's a REALLY popular topic. Just like you said.

Alternative theory from data collected since March.


Viewers more often read only first two words of title before viewing. Time spent fits theory.

[splashing sound--] What were the firs--that would mean--OH, YOU ALL SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES. [gill equivalent of giggling] YOU thought I was showing-- [incoherent gill noises, more splashing.]

Blog time again.

Wh--oh. [translates to ahem] Yeah, look at THIS scandalous picture . . .

Herr D convinced me to do this one on
I guess I did okay . . .  Hairy Deewon.                                  
I spent some time reading the complaints Shelob showed me about capitalism, government, big business, and economic disparity. I was particularly fascinated by the term 'outsourcing.' Let me define a term for ease.

"Wage multiplier" or WM, would be the constant to multiply the lowest salary/expected annual wages to equal the highest salary/expected annual wages within the same company/corporation.

Some identifiers of a well-run company besides the most obvious (extreme low turnover) is that it doesn't have a WM larger than 10. If the CEO of Asteroid Smelting, Ltd. is worth 100,000 acg/year, and any job in the company is worth less than 10,000 acg/year, then the company should hire someone else to handle it. Why wouldn't they? Badly-run businesses help ruin economies and generally lower everyone's standard of living. Obviously, there's a lot of flawed comparative valuation out there--this society pays some professional boxers more than certified nursing assistants, but this is about the outsourcing complaint.


In cases where the highest-paid are in a horribly small minority, I offer the following solution:

CEO of Interplanetary Exhumation makes 91 million acg yearly, while the average of all ten demolitions experts makes 91,000 acg. With a WM of 1000, this company is obviously poorly structured. Obviously the demolitions experts are needed on site, so they can't be outsourced to Yurshoozsmellikekelpistan--but the country has a lower cost of living, on a ratio of 1:100 to IE's country.

In this example, IE is better off outsourcing the CEO, essentially lowering his salary to 910,000 acg, and returning IE to the category of a well-run company. Profits should rise fairl--

Geographical error, no locality found--

Leave it, Shelob! Down boy! [sudden disconnec-

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