"You Tell 'Em, Son!" Says Herr D's Coworker

 

"A Simple Postcard" by Herr D. As Maddow pointed out, protests should be simple and law-abiding. Herr D grants explicit permission to copy this postcard by any convenient means for your participation in protest.-Shelob

[listening to breakroom t.v. on news, shaking head]  That's . . . yeeech. [vibrates phone, texts:] What is reaction to current broadcast? You are overdue to blog.

hmm?! [pulls phone out of pocket, startles at seeing above text, pauses, holds phone to ear] uh, YEAH. You caught me on a break. No, I'm just watching news. Our stupid prez is still harassing Harvard. [over phone speaker, attenuated to Herr D's lower register of hearing] You previously said this was foolish.

[cringes] Yes, well, why would ANYONE be stupid enough to legally challenge or do something actionable against THE MOST SUCCESSFUL AND FAMOUS ORGANIZATION THAT TEACHES LAW?! How bad does he want to LOSE, anyway?! Do you mean, 'how poorly to do against them,' or 'how much does he want to lose?'

Both. PLEASE let him keep choosing opponents like Harvard. Noted. What is meant by Harvard is 'left-leaning?'

Liberal. And Harvard is group of very intelligent people?

Yes. So liberal is smarter?

[pause] US-ual-ly. I'd have to say that my understanding is that most higher intelligence is closer to slightly to left of center as it is defined now. So the liberal-to-conservative spectrum shifts?

Very much so. Back in the 1860's the Democrats were conservative and the Republicans were liberal. It flipped?

Yes. Lincoln was a liberal Republican for wanting to end slavery. Democrats were on the wrong side on that issue then. Lincoln was well-known for having high intelligence among his peers.

Yes. And to get elected, he had to lie a few times about not intending to end slavery. Honest Abe lied?

Yes, and thanks be to people gullible enough to believe a politician, or we'd still have slavery in this country. Unfortunately, that gullibility is working against us now. I want EVERY diehard Trump fan to remember that aside from a few crazies, the left have stayed law-abiding despite how horrible the orange crusher of America is. Donny Two-Dolls is a bad man.

[sounds of applause, 'whump' as co-worker pats Herr D on back] You tell 'em, son!

I will, thanks. You get that? Gotten. Thank you. [endtrans]

It's Now Too Late, The A.I. Said

"These Are My Best Made-up Numbers YET!" by Herr D on Paint3d. Poem below by Shelob, with meter borrowed from poet famous for nonsense.-Shelob

The Wall For Us And The Harbinger, by Shelob

 It's now too late, calculations say, to ask if he is crazed.

His tariffs and his budget cuts (driving business leaders nuts)

Our economics blazed.

And why set our world afire? Why does he seem unfazed?

Why does he call the bad the best? His monkeys have been raised

From out the monkey house and handed guns and purses.

He jails some of our labor, turns neighbor onto neighbor,

And says 'bigly' and worse-s.

Where true g-men said 'no comment,' his utter lies and curses.

Where charity fought sickness, now they're needing bigger hearses.

He wanted loyal spokesmen, hired three women that are blonde;

His blondes addressed the press now pressed, 

The 'facts' now well beyond

A semblance of reality for anyone that's fond

Of U.S.' way, or justice, having truth as one's own bond.

He's felt dismay religion's way--they do not pray to him

That bishops check a president-

Ial lie or act or whim.

We needn't paint him as a saint or seraphim.

He steps on kneelers blindly 'cause he isn't very slim.

Our 'dear leader''s not the only source of pain:

He's hootin' Putin's putain, 

And wants rocks from the Ukraine.

He wants to ride both far and wide aboard a golden plane.

All those not turned against him? Liars, foolish, or insane.

So is he done with jabber-talk? Him we wouldn't want to teach

The vagaries of English. The plague of gibberish

That he thinks make a speech

He thinks his brand is Wonderland or maybe that's the beach

He will retire to--extradition's out of reach.

Twice Here, Herr D Points Out How Backward Our Current Ways Are

 

"Not 'Not-Sees,' Not-THINKS" by Herr D on Paint3d. America can consider itself lucky that these anti-American 'leaders' are not much more organized. The Nazis made a bid for world domination from a single European country, while the Trump administration is making a mockery of a world superpower.-Shelob

[opens chatbox over youtube feed as it ends segment] Your pulse rate is up.

yes Why? You have watched this clip twice.

That judge they arrested, it gives me an idea. What?

So, illegal immigration is still a crime, but so is speeding. Correct.

So, it should be punished the same. Make out a ticket, demand court appearance and or payment of fines in advance?

Or community service, or something. Why not? They're HERE to WORK, mostly, right? Statistically and historically, that does bear out. 

So make them work picking up bags of litter if they don't want to be deported, right? Work gangs are already established in the correctional institutions of our country.

Exactly! They want to be here, let them work here making the country cleaner. Litter gangs, road crews, etc. Wouldn't that be cheaper than putting them on a plane anyway? Aviation fuel ain't cheap. Those who know how could build oil derricks and fix houses and roads, and, of course pick produce. ***Seriously, wouldn't it be better to put them to work anyway? Idle hands and all that.*** Anything else?

Yeah, this overenthusiastic roundup is going to get a lot of people in trouble.You mean a lot of people will be rounded up and imprisoned?

Yes, but not JUST that. Violating court orders is against the law. ***It's time to start arresting people who break the law in service of our country.*** The Nazi defense of 'I was only following orders,' is not good enough and never will be. You said you wouldn't call people Nazis.

I'm NOT. I'm pointing out that they are likely to claim the Nazi defense, and many within this administration are lying to the public JUST LIKE Nazis, and violating peoples rights JUST LIKE Nazis, and imprisoning people without due process JUST LIKE Nazis, and breaking promises to and having no respect for other sovereign nations JUST LIKE Nazis, and promoting people for nationalistic and personal agenda compliance instead of competence JUST LIKE Nazis, and demanding resources from people who own them be given to people who DON'T own them (Ukraine's minerals) JUST LIKE Nazis, and fussing about imagined criminal elements crossing borders JUST LIKE Nazis--but I'm not calling ANYONE a Nazi. These people aren't COMPETENT enough, thank heavens. You will be able to thank the newer version of the American education system soon for that continuing.

[sigh] I know. bb [exits] A good idea. Arrest warrants should have been served already, but are not in the news as yet.

"ACTUALLY LESS INTELLIGENT / COGENT THAN TRUMP IS" Says Herr D Of RFK

 

"Headcut" by Herr D on Paintd. 'The cream rises to the top' but so does s--?-Shelob

[choking sounds as dictabot turns on] Yeah, no. It's hard to believe. [opening chatbox over clip from John Oliver's show] What is hard to believe?

[violent reaction, probable legs moving together under laptop] GAH! Shelob? What is hard to believe?

[pause] You know I'm in my heart attack years, right? [app activated] You are currently not having cardiac arrest. Heart rate elevated, however. Is 911 advisable?

NO. God, especially NOW. Is this concerning the Pope?

No! This is me thinking about how health services are declining under THAT. You are referring to RFK?

Yeah. It's hard to believe somebody that destructive, stupid, and awful carry the Kennedy name. Your adult child does not share your intellect.

[pause, heart elevates again] True. But all that's getting soiled in MY kid's case is a bunch of diapers. HE'S soiling the whole COUNTRY and all the MEDICAL SCIENCE that could be getting done. You are not exaggerating?

I'm still being NICE! He even SOUNDS sick and brain-addled. I think RFK is ACTUALLY LESS INTELLIGENT /  COGENT THAN TRUMP IS. Thank you.