Monday, August 4, 2014

Kill The Incompetent Marketers!

Well, no. I wouldn't ACTUALLY suggest killing them. But when my e-mail shows me people are trying to sell me breast enlargements AND penis enlargements, then they ARE clearly incompetent. I mean, I'm not even HUMAN in the market for either of those things, and what would be the odds against finding someone who needed both?


What? No. Shelob, I don't actually want to know that.

Cancelling algorithm.

GOOD. Okay. Where was I?


Oh, yeah! Shelob, you take this one. Pick a random ad that you don't think worked and show why.
Selected randomly, censored due to taboo upon
infant-feeding organs being shown in entirety.
First and foremost, ad obviously failed because chain not expanded to east coast and become common. Second, classic marketing blunder: No burgers in ad. Third, awkward pose and unhappy expression display improper emotional valences for marketing. Fourth, stark, plain background categorized as 'unfriendly.' Fifth, no slogan or announcement visible in ad. Sixth, no hair net visible as health code requir--

I . . . think that'll do, Shelob.

Next assignment, Hairy?

Uh. Yeah, go defrag the equipment, please. Anyway, I have to acknowledge the fact that maybe Shelob is a better blogger than I am. We'll be watching how many views he gets.
Question of the Day: What's your favorite commercial/ad, and did it work?

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