Friday, October 17, 2014

Give A Hoot, Fan Out Your Commute

Okay. So here's something, Shelob. Why is that awful crowd in the morning called a rush hour? It's longer than an hour and everyone's moving too slow.

They are hurrying at the same time, overwhelming the available space. The time is a vague reference like 'world' for individual experience or 'man' for humankind.

Good thing I left you on 'destroy aphorism' mode while we moved. So everyone wants to be at work at the same time, huh?

Evidence suggests otherwise. Numerous complaints are available for perusal on social media.

Did you just say numerous? You didn't COUNT them?

You programmed me to stop counting at 1,000,000 if there was no specific number request.

How many references did you count?


One guy enjoyed his commute?

Specifically he enjoyed watching a woman change clothes in the back of a cab beside him.

Did he stream video? [quick scrabble for neuralink adjustment] Awh, man.

I need more practice. --Hairy Deewon.
So, no one enjoys their commute. Why do they do it?

No reason why specifically posted. Preliminary research suggests mindless tradition.

Are there other options available?

Many well-run companies encourage telecommuting for logistically feasible positions. Service and labor positions frequently encourage 'carpooling,' shared rides--

No! I mean--why don't they go at other times?

Time travel has not been officially invented by humanity.

No. No-- I mean, why would people only open their businesses at the same time? [quick uplink, one hour passes] Herr D says that you've had electric light for about a hundred years. There's no reason why all businesses couldn't be open 24/7?

[sixteen second web search] Approximately 20% of human population might be negatively affected without regular exposure to sunlight. Varying degrees of Seasonal Affect Disorder and vitamin D deficiency-related illnesses, sleep disorders, exist in humanity.

That's all? Yikes. Shelob? Project benefits of 24/7 society. [brief interlude while making graphic]

Ease of commute to eventually lower traffic accidents. Medical community to improve as more workers become willing to cater to them and be more available. Thousands of jobs temporarily available as acoustic tile installers. 

Excellent! Someone get to work on that, okay?

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