Deal Or No Deal Is A Show, Right?

[all five pupils dilate, Hairy turns off newsfeed] SHELOB!

Here.

Why is there such a disparity between the descriptions of the deal with Iran? Good deal, bad deal--no nukes for Iran, nuclear arms race in the middle East?

They are political opinions. Most of them are not based upon fact. Most of them are from pundits, which you have defined for me as current-situational fiction.

[neurological eye twitch--attempt to use recall deliberately] Yeah, I'm spacing on which ones of those were people I'd vetted as just sensationalistic morons out for ratings. Why am I so upset? The deal sounds like it might not happen anyway?

[.23 seconds pass] Report by medbot indicates your neurohormonal levels unusually high. Holistic thinking has taken place at an unusual rate. You have now a pseudo-rational instinct based on neural processing. 

Yeah, but I can't figure out what I'm thinking? Like maybe a huge nuclear testing facility in a bomb-proof bunker makes a better diversion than genocidal plot device?

Initial calculations agree with your assessment. Beginning reprocessing now. [disconnect]